Why are all images in the media of the black society negative? Why is it that the idea of a successful, well adjusted, black American unrealistic to the common black person? Why are there people who are in the public eye who see the problem and have the solution, but do nothing to put it in effect?
As a young, black female in today’s society, I am at a loss for words. Growing up, the television shows that I watched and that I can say a good number of my friends watched were shows such as: The Cosby Show, Good Times, The Jefferson’s, The Fresh-Prince of Bel-Air, Family Matters & 227. All of these shows have something in common, families that consist of a mother and father who are married. So why are the same images that were portrayed to us in the media at a young age not the real images we see everyday? In relation to the people of my generation, the only people who stay married for 50 years these days are our grandparents. Our parents have fallen off the bandwagon, that image of “a happy home” is slowly being diminished.
From there, single-parent homes, are the birthplace of a series of problems; starting with mothers being the sole nurtures of a generation of not just young people, but more specifically young men. Women are not equipped to teach young men the things they need to know to be successful in this world. Hence the reason why there are rising high school drop-out rates, increasing imprisonment rates, etc. On the other hand, men, fathers, give young women, their daughters, a keen insight on how young men think and behave that a mother cannot offer you. Therefore, there are increasing birth rates among young, black women, increasing numbers in STD’s detected in females between 16-25, etc. Not saying that the single mothers aren’t trying, they are, but they cannot do it alone; it takes two parents, a mother AND a father to raise a child. Not saying their child will be perfect, but there is an advantage in coming from a two parent household.
Continuing on the downward cycle that we are propelling ourselves into, we have a generation of young men who see their mothers struggling and want to help. But the images shown on modern television and heard in today’s music and read in urban fiction do not portray the images that we want to be enacted by our youth. Idolized authors, musicians, actors and any black person who is a public figure is not at fault for the problems, but is at a fault for not enforcing a solution. We hear of prominent black people such as Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton who are constantly seen on television speaking about the problems are community is facing, but how often do we see them backing up what they speak. I have heard them speak about solutions, but none that appear as plans that will be effective.
My generation is so far gone in negative images that we have psychologically tricked ourselves into believing that we are successful. For example, there is the entrepreneur, aka the neighborhood “dope man” who makes $2,000 a day. This same person recruits, or “hires,” our youth, the youth who looks up to us, as employees to sell their product, giving them false hopes and dreams of success and prosperity. Our young men see the money, the big house, the fancy car and the affection of the females and truly believe that is “making it.” Our young women, don’t see the wrong that these young men are doing, they only see the benefits they reap from this and want to be attached to it because that is what they are attracted to. Young women are not off the hook on this one either. We are just as far gone that we cannot see past the crap placed in front of us. We are blinded by the money, the house and the cars that we are willing to do nearly any and everything just get noticed by these guys. And the thing about these young women is that they do not care how you get your money, as long as they can get some of it, they’re fine. That’s why you hear about athletes getting trapped by these young women who have sex with them or women who get pregnant to trap wealthy men. Young women like this are the reason for the term gold digger. Hard-work and morals went out the window a long time ago; why should I work for what you got? It’s like the “Real Housewives of the Hood.”
Now, not completely going on about the young men in our society, there are young women who need to step up and make changes as well. Young men act the way they do for one reason: We allow it. Women hold more mental power over men, than men do over women. There are a lot of intellectual, sophisticated, successful, black women in this world, but they make poor choices and those same poor choices affect an entire group of people. Let me say it this way to better explain what I mean. If black women set higher standards in men, and do not settle or compromise those standards, the men of our society will change or better themselves to meet the requirements. Now in saying that, we cannot set standards and expect immediate results, but we need to not only say what we want, but go about in initiating the change we want to see in our society. We cannot continue to settle for the dope man boyfriend, or for having the deadbeat baby’s daddy. We can do better. We HAVE to do better!
At one point in time, our society was nothing, we were treated as nothing, we were valued by others as nothing. We were enslaved physically, emotionally and mentally. And there were people who fought for us, who gave their lives for what they believed in so we could see a brighter day. And over the year, so much progress had been made, but somewhere along the way from then to now, things have started to shift and we got some cracks in our foundation. And we as a community, we have started to fall off. The black community as a whole unit to get back to that same fighter mentality; we need to fight for what we believe in, fight for those we love, fight for our future…fight for change!
One woman, one black woman, is the personification, the epitome, the vision of a single positive image in today’s black society. Michelle Obama is Clair Huxtable (The Cosby Show). She is Vivian Banks (Fresh Prince of Bel-Air). She is Harriette Winslow (Family Matters). She is Denise Archibald (John Q). She is a successful, intelligent, articulate black woman. She is a mother and a wife. She upholds the values that black people first sought out when trying to achieve the American dream. A dream that is built on Hard-work. Ethics. Morals. Honesty. Dedication. The American dream represents the promise of prosperity. As stated in the Declaration of Independence, it is that “all men are created equal” and that they are “endowed by their Creator with certain inalienable Rights” including “Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.” In our society, it appears to be that we think that we are to be given prosperity. We act as if all men are not created equal, not because we weren’t, but because we believe something is owed to us, therefore we are not always treated equally. Endowed, meaning you are given or born with certain inalienable, undeniable Rights. But some people in our society have expanded on what those rights really are. Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness; a lot of us are not living the lives we should be living, or living according to the governing law or the will of God. A lot of us have taken advantage of our liberty, or our freedom and have conceived in our minds that we have the authority to do as we please and act as we please. And a lot of us are pursuing happiness, but the question is, is it happiness based on our material gain or is it based on out emotional gain?
Now this thing is way deeper than some people are willing to look or accept, but the black community is one that has moments of strength and of weakness. We were brought to America against our will: weakness. We fought to be treated as equals and have the same rights as everyone else: strength. We fought to be portrayed positively in the media: strength. Our society physically achieved the visual image portrayed: strength. Influential, negative images were created by black people as a source of income: weakness. And here we are, still at a weak point. We need to break the cycle and continue to grow. We need to stand STRONG together to change the way we are portrayed. We need to fight for what we know is well and good. It starts here. It starts now. It starts with you!
Written By: Merritt Catherine Ryan-Jones
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